14 Comments

Very nice.

My favorite Rock Star is Mark Farner.

Though his band, Grand Funk, was at one time in the early seventies the world's biggest Rock Band and he was a huge star, he is 75 years old and still married to the wife of his youth.

That's what I call success!

Expand full comment

As a GenXer, I am hard-wired for cynicism. Agree with Von, it is how I protected myself against all the fbomb madness.

Gratitude is awesome. We actually teach it in the Army. Part of the Resilience curriculum. I spent a few weeks at UPENN in 2010/11 ish to learn the program of which gratitude practice is one of the tools.

I've come to understand that when I'm filled with gratitude, nothing else is capable of entering my body, mind, spirit. Gratitude is the appropriate foxhole from which to view the world, the clearest picture. Due to some of our truly hard-wired tendencies, hueristics, biases--practicing gratitude opens us to the positive possibilities we overlook when our eyes are clouded by cynicism, pain, and fear.

bsn

Expand full comment
author

hear, hear

Expand full comment

The pose of the jaded skeptic in adolescence and young adulthood is as much a form of self protection from all that you mentioned as it is the rigously defended cool pose required to remain part of the pack. Some never mature or grow enough to discard it for a more genuine perspective. To those that do, the universe says, “Welcome, we are open and at your service”. To those who remain, it says “How’s that working for ya?” To help you out, the universe sent your wife.❤️. Sometimes we get lucky.

Expand full comment
author

Life's been brutal to me but, on the other hand, it's been blessed.

Whichever narrative predominates, I suppose, comes down to a matter of perspective.

Expand full comment

I'd also gently suggest the narrative which predominates is the narrative we nourish.

bsn

Expand full comment

True meditation has no object . The consciousness which we experience as the feeling , I am , isolates itself from all objectivity and remains as pure subjectivity. The state of pure subjectivity is known as samadhi. Thus the consciousness transcends itself and returns to it's source , the un-born non-state of non- experience and non-existence prior to the birth of the consciousness.

Expand full comment
author

I suppose I can intellectually process that but I haven't achieved anything close to samadhi, as it's apparently called, and can't even imagine what it would be like experientially. Or, non-experientially, I guess, would be more accurate.

Expand full comment

For THAT to happen you must be absent , a slight dilemma , lol.

Expand full comment

Hi Ben,

As it happens, my sister developed a mindfulness training program called 'Inner Explorer' for schoolchildren as part of her PhD dissertation. While broadly applicable for all types and ages, it's primarily targeted for public schools with large percentage of children from lower income homes. This program is currently available in ~30,000 classrooms in the USA

I mention this because the Atlanta school district adopted this program in the last 2 years to good benefit and have enlisted the Atlanta Hawks basketball team as major supporters for the program.

Thought you might want to know that your school district recognized a need to help children gain self control & self regulation via mindfulness training.

Expand full comment
author

that sounds interesting.

to clarify, I went to school in DeKalb and Cobb counties, the former being basically Atlanta but not in the Atlanta school district proper

Expand full comment
author

nonetheless, all public school districts could probably use mindfulness training programs

Expand full comment

What a lovely St. Val's Day post!

Lifted my jaded heart!

Btw, I share your reticence regarding what's termed New Age stuff. Not so much the stuff itself but the awarenesss of its monetization, weaponization, and general use for manipulation. But, as with everything: - discernment, caution and gentle exploration.

Wishing you and your wife a fulfilling partnership.

Expand full comment
author

thanks, Zarayna

Expand full comment