More Fake Fed Nazis Show Up in Wisconsin

No one has a bigger cosplay fetish than an alphabet agency spook.

The inaugural titular head of the FBI, in fact, J. Edgar Hoover, was infamously reported to enjoy getting dressed up in lady-clothes and exploring his feminine side while trampling on the slaves’ Constitutional rights. Wearing pumps really, allegedly, got his authoritarian vigor up.

          Related: Told Ya: 'Patriot Front' Fed Op Confirmed?

Anyway, the ADL apparently needs some more White Supremacy™ fear porn (demand always outstripping supply, as it does) for distribution in donation solicitation literature, and so the feds supplied in the form of a handful of masked “Nazis” taking an afternoon family stroll through the Capitol of Wisconsin.

Viewer discretion is advised. Hide the kids; they may never recover from the images below.

Truly horrific, graphic stuff. How could this happen on the streets of America?  

The platoon of more than a dozen Fed Nazis were on the verge, really, of overtaking the Wisconsin capitol and establishing an Aryan Caliphate right in the heart of the Midwest.

But let’s note some inconsistencies.

By the looks of it, at least one-fourth of this fearsome fighting force qualifies as morbidly obese.

But, if we know anything about Nazis, it’s that they’re obsessed with fitness. MSNBC told me that.

          Related: #BodyPositivity Propaganda Roundup: ‘Muh White Supremacy’ Edition

Seriously, though, no truly committed fascist revolutionary would allow himself to grow tits. That’s now how this works.

What’s awesome is that, if you examine the videos, you’ll notice the people of Madison simply walking by about their business, casually observing the Nazi parade, as if a handful of feds with Swastika flags doing pageantry through town is so commonplace now as to not even warrant a stop and look-see.

“How was your trip to the pharmacy downtown, sweetheart?”

“Pretty good babe. Razors were on sale. The Fed Nazis were out again. They got some new costumes this time.”

“Haha. Those darn Fed Nazis. Always up to their hijinks. They’re incorrigible.”

Ben Bartee, author of Broken English Teacher: Notes From Exile, is an independent Bangkok-based American journalist with opposable thumbs.

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